Women can’t get pregnant the first time they have sex—myth or fact? Oral sex can get women pregnant—myth or fact? Men want more sex than women—myth or fact? In today’s information-overload age, there’s so much information available that even the most discerning of the human species has difficulty separating fact from friction. You think you know everything there is to know about sex? Don’t be too quick to believe everything you hear or read about it. Truth is, people lie, exaggerate, and talk good game when it comes to sex. And if you’re not careful, you might find yourself eating out of a plate full of the most ridiculous sex myths—and dearly paying for it. So read on and let’s put these sex whoppers to bed once and for all…
1. Bigger is NOT better. Are you kidding? Don’t believe anyone who says so. What else would explain the pervasion of miracle growth patches and pills and penile implants? Truth is, we do prefer a bigger penis—aesthetically or fit-wise. But what to do if you’re not supersized and opposed to scientific interventions? Don’t fret as there are many ways to compensate. Maximize the use of your penis by learning some penetration techniques which can involve alternating long/short, slow/fast strokes, sensual rolling of the pelvis, and well as, experimenting with various sexual positions that promote deep and maximum penetration despite lacking an inch or two.
2. The male appendage is the only way to please a woman. Though the importance of size cannot be emphasized more, you MUST know that penile penetration is not the only way to please us. Female orgasm can also be achieved through inspired oral techniques.
3. Clitoral orgasm is inferior compared to its vaginal counterpart. Forget what Mr. Freud said about the superiority of vaginal orgasm obtained only through penetrative sex. Clitoral or vaginal, all we care about is our orgasm and you’d better give it to us!
4. I couldn’t help getting too excited, you were simply scorching! Duuude, don’t put the blame on us. It’s NOT flattering when you ejaculate within seconds of vaginal penetration. That’s called premature ejaculation and you need to keep it in check. Doing your Kegels will help. This exercise tightens the pubococcygeal (PC) muscles of the pelvic floor. It’s the muscle group that cuts off the flow of urine, if you’re not familiar with it. Tighten your PC muscles for 10 seconds and do this 10 times.
5. Men want more action than women do. Because sex is fuelled by testosterone which men have a lot of, it’s a common belief that men hanker for sex more than women. But, uhrmmm, times have changed. Now that women already know much more about how their bodies work and how to enjoy themselves in bed, they have become as sexually motivated as men.
6. Women can’t get pregnant the first time they have sex. Women can get pregnant ANYTIME they have unprotected sex.
7. Or by doing it standing up. Having sex in any position—standing up, kneeling down, upside down, however which way you prefer it—carries with it the risk of pregnancy if protection is not used.
8. Or by using douche afterwards. Sperm are extremely fast swimmers and hundreds of thousands of them can reach the uterus even before the woman can douche. What’s more, the pressure of the solution squirted into the vagina can even push sperm into the uterus.
9. Or when stoned and high on something. Unless you are both SO stoned that you end up not having sex at all, getting high is not even considered a method of contraception.
10. Or by making her sneeze for fifteen minutes after sex. False. Definitely. For all the obvious reasons.
11. Or when women have their period. Sperm stays alive for several days once inside the vagina—simply put, even if the last time you two had sex was three days ago during her period, she could now be ovulating and facing the risk of pregnancy.
12. Or by doing it in a hot tub… Truth is, women can get pregnant under any of the circumstances mentioned—unless, of course, she’s already pregnant or sterile. Even condoms or other form of birth control DO NOT guarantee a 100 percent foolproof method of preventing pregnancy. So if you choose to have sex, regardless of when and how, know what you might be getting yourself into and see if you’re ready for it.
13. Having sexual intercourse before an important event— a sporting event or a critical business presentation - can cause a significant dip in your performance. Some Swiss researchers performed stress tests on people 2 and 10 hours after the subjects had had sex, and found that by 10 hours, the subjects were already fully-recovered. There was only a small dip in performance 2 hours after sex.
14. You can’t get STIs from oral sex. I’m sure you’ve heard of herpes, syphilis, chlamydia, gonorrhea and nonspecific urethritis (NSU), an inflammation of the urethra (the tube where urine comes out) that only affects men—these are STIs that you can get from oral sex.
15. Women go off sex during and after menopause. NOT TRUE. These days, women above 50 are said to be healthier than their predecessors. And with some help through hormone therapy, they’re no longer plagued with low sex drive and vaginal dryness. Cougar town is certainly open for business.
16. Oysters spur horniness. Giovanni Casanova, the Venetian adventurer and infamous seducer, believed in the power of oysters, which seems an authoritative, first-hand endorsement. However, there is no scientific evidence to prove oysters increase sex drive. But then again, any placebo can work if you believe in it.
17. Oral sex can get you pregnant. Only if your ovaries are somewhere in the same area. Oral sex cannot get a woman pregnant, not even if there’s swallowing involved.
18. Wetness does NOT equate to how turned on a woman is. Not getting lubricated enough does not necessarily mean we’re not aroused. Monthly cycle, pregnancy, illness, menopause, medications (such as antihistamines and decongestants) can affect our lubrication. So boys, no reason for you to get your boxer briefs all twisted in a bunch. Unless we’re really NOT turned on and in which case, we’ll make sure you’re well-informed.
19. Sex toys can ruin your ability to achieve orgasm with your partner. Granted that women, in some cases, climax faster with battery-operated gadget, there’s still nothing quite like the real thing.
20. The best sex is an all-nighter. Not true, says sex therapist Laura Berman, MD. In fact, recent studies say that 7-13 minutes is the ideal length of intercourse. But hey, if you can swing an all-nighter, we’re not complaining!
21. Pulling out before ejaculation means no babies. So NOT true. While sperm is concentrated in semen expelled during ejaculation, sperm can still be present in seminal fluid—the clear, sticky substance released continuously from first moments of arousal. Of the millions of sperm present during ejaculation, it only takes one to get her pregnant.
22. "Comparing notes" in a new relationship can lead to better sex. Sexual chemistry between couples is different and spending time thinking about old partners can definitely take away a substantial amount of focus on the pleasure derived from your current mate.
23. AIDS is a homosexual disease. Not only is this statement derogatory, it’s also very untrue. Studies show that the HIV virus is rapidly increasing among heterosexuals than homosexuals.
24. Intact hymen means she’s a virgin. Not quite, says gynecologist Ranjana Dhanu, MD. “An intact hymen is not a definition of virginity at all. This is because with women, doing so much of strenuous physical activity and exercise it is normal if your hymen stretches or even breaks during these activities.”
25. She can’t get pregnant from anal sex. Indeed, because the anus has no connection to the uterus or fallopian tubes. However, sperm can very easily dribble out and make their way to the vagina, so there is a very real risk of pregnancy.
26. Using someone else’s birth control pills before sex can’t get you pregnant. Birth control pills take a full MONTH to be at all effective, so one day and one pill won’t help her at all.
27. "Blue Balls" is just an expression. Blue balls, or painful vasocongestion, is actually a very real condition and it occurs during arousal and blood flow increases to the genitals, exerting pressure on the blood vessels and surrounding tissue. After orgasm or ejaculation, the blood flow decreases and the pressure is released. But if orgasm or ejaculation doesn’t occur, the pressure can cause pain or discomfort.
28. Two condoms are better than one. False. Wearing one on top of the other only increases friction that may cause breakage.
29. Men are into full-on Frenching at all times. – Not so, says William Cane, author of The Art of Kissing, who surveyed 50,000 men and found there are 30 different kinds of smooching moves guys love that don’t involve jamming their tongues into women’s mouths and vice-versa.
30. Everyone’s having multiples; it’s not an unusual feat. So NOT true. Sexologist Dr. Gabrielle Morrissey says, “While some women do experience multiple orgasms, it’s rarely all the time. It depends on the technique of both you and your partner. The worst thing you can do is get preoccupied with trying so hard – it’ll probably result in the opposite effect.” So stop stressing and have fun!
Inspired thoughts put into writing by Vicky Ras.